Contributor: Sam Bernhofer - - Dieter fucked his hand while his girlfriend Andrea was in class. Three years ago, Dieter and Stephanie broke up. Two weeks after that, Dieter was in a relationship with Andrea. “It’s not official until you change your relationship status on Facebook.” Andrea told Dieter. He used shaving cream. He rushed. He thought of nothing really. Maybe it was the memory of Stephanie, five months earlier, changing in front of him so confidently only minutes after seeing him for the first time in two years that got it done. Six months earlier while Dieter was still with Andrea, he had sent Stephanie an anagrammed poem about her and she said “Keep telling me.” Stephanie was the catalyst Dieter needed to leave Andrea, “For good this time.” “When are you coming to see me…” she said. He went. He ruined Andrea. He drove to...

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Author: Sam Bernhofer